Last April 2019, Mai, 13, requested a short visit home during the summer holiday to visit her stepmother, Lamai, 78. Mai is very close to her stepmother since she lost her father eleven years ago, and also lost touch with her biological mother since her remarriage. It had been a while since Mai saw Lamai, and it was difficult for both Mai and Lamai to be apart. However, Lamai had to make a tough decision regarding sending Mai to ADRA’s Keep Girls Safe Shelter as she struggled to provide for Mai’s needs and protection. On May 11, 2017, Mai came to stay at ADRA’s Keep Girls Safe shelter.
Just before the Songkran holidays Mai returned to her village, Hmong Village, to see Lamai. For the first five days, she helped her sister-in-law plant ginger on her farm before proceeding to stay with Lamai.
One evening while Mai was at Lamai’s home, a big truck parked in front of the house. Several men got off the truck and went into the house. They took Mai and pushed Lamai on the floor. “I tried to resist, but I couldn’t. They were too many and they were too strong,” recalled Mai. All she could do was cry for help.
The men carried Mai to the truck, took her away and left Lamai lying on the floor. All Mai’s attempts to escape from those men only left her with bruises.
Mai’s cousin, Meow, heard the screaming, so she came running to Lamai’s house. As she got closer to the front door, she saw Mai being carried away, and Lamai lying helpless on the floor.
Mai was taken to the house of one of the young men who had abducted her. She was told that he would be her husband. He was just eighteen.
The parents of the young man tried to convince Mai to accept the marriage proposal but Mai strongly refused to do so. “I am still very young and I want to study. I wish to keep my promise to my mother,” pleaded Mai.
Trying to get help for Mai, Meow immediately contacted the Keep Girls Safe shelter coordinator since it is unusual to seek assistance from law enforcement. At around 10.00 pm that evening, the shelter coordinator and shelter manager were able to get help from Mai’s relatives.
At 2.00 o’clock in the morning, Lamai arrived at the young man’s house with the help of her relatives and took Mai back home with her.
In Hmong culture, it is believed that if a lady has already entered the groom’s house, spirits of the house live inside her so she is not to leave the groom’s house. However, if she does leave, she is no longer regarded as pure.
Since Mai would be perceived impure in the community, the groom’s relative went to see Lamai and asked if she would like them to take Mai back. Despite the cultural beliefs, nothing could change Lamai’s wish for Mai’s education and hope for a better future. “My daughter is too young to get married,” insisted Lamai.
Mai was released from the young man’s family after Lamai’s strong disapproval of the marriage.
That same morning, the shelter coordinator and church pastor went to Lamai’s house and discussed the matter with Lamai and Mai. “The church pastor advised me not to stay in my house anymore, as it is not a safe place,” said Mai.
After Mai’s refusal, the young man married another young girl from the village. Mai later heard that the thirteen year-old wife is now pregnant.
Knowing that she is now safe at the shelter Mai said, “I am very happy to be back here and I feel that this is a safe place for me.” Mai is continuing her studies in eighth grade and hopes to become a nurse or caretaker in the future.